Following a gathering of bruised clouds in the global money markets; a deluge of gloom in the UK media; and a fairly tenacious bout of general precipitation, you'll doubtless be alarmed to hear that yet another bank has collapsed. This is clearly devastating, as you can see from the horrific on-the-spot picture below.

UK citizens were urged to at least shoulder some of the blame for their irresponsible attitude to borrowing and spending, and their unshakeable assumption that the rains would never come. But most were immovable.

One bystander, who wished to remain anonymous, was quoted as saying that the situation "was not good". When prodded violently and sprayed with Mace, he subsequently changed this answer to: "Well, it's really not good at all".

The truth, however, is inescapable: we were all partially culpable by assuming that the rivers would endlessly flow and life would flourish.

Prominent government officials are already lobbying US Financial Institutions for a $7.00 USD cash injection to buy three trowels and a bag of cement. The likelihood of success in this appeal however, looks slim.

Sometimes it takes a cataclysmic catastrophe of gargantuan proportions, merely to remind you of what your true blessings really are. Whatever you're doing now, I implore you; go and give your children a kiss and tell them that you love them. If you don't have children, build some using cocktail sticks and potatoes.

Until aid is realised, please give all you can and send your cheques straight to me. At a push, I'll accept money via Paypal.

Thank you.

TrackBack URI for this entry

Comments (0)

Subscribe to this comment's feed

Show/hide comments

Show/hide comment form

Write comment

Name

Email

Website

Title

Comment

smaller | bigger

Subscribe via email (registered users only)

I have read and agree to the Terms of Usage.

Add Comment